A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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