New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
