Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
This house was built for laser tag.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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