Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Randomize
