ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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