I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
