A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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