I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
