he wants to bone in the snuggie
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
