Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
