So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
