You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
