would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
