I'm going to jail i love you
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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