Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
