I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
