The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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