Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
