everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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