haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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