not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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