I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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