She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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