So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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