If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
So many bounce houses so little time
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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