He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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