Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Alive.
So much puke
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
