plz talk dirty to me
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
