Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize