Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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