no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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