i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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