Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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