do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize