five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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