Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
