Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Randomize
