he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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