I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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