How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
