A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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