Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
