we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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