Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
