it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
