Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
