i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize