She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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