gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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