thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Drake has all the answers
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
